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Well kitties, excuse me while I try to get over the fact that no one has proper breedin’ and etiquette anymore.

I am just appalled with the lack of southern charm and grace goin’ on in 2012. I don’t know who to blame at this point or when it exactly started, but I am just shocked.

Everyone knows this is my pet peeve..lack of manners. Y’all, my blood is boilin over~ how hard is it to adhere to some sort of protocol in life? Otherwise we will walk around like undignified animals! What’s to stop us from grunting at each other anymore? As a wise woman once said “The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.”  Thank you Clairee from Steel Magnolias! and must I say, some people can’t even do THAT properly.

What has started me off on this, dear kitties, is my daughter’s baby shower this past weekend. As a proper Southern lady, I made sure I ordered printed invitations and addressed them within 3 weeks of the event. I even noted on the invitation that RSVP regrets only by a certain date and provided my phone number. Well, weeks passed by and my daughter got sorries on facebook and word of mouth, but no one bothered to pay attention to the invitation~ then the date came and went that they were supposed to reply by. Well, your Scarlett has faith in people and carried on with preparations assumin that we would have a large group attending.

Imagine my surprise when the day came, rain was predicted and I had to move the whole thing inside my little house! Panic stricken at the thought of not being a good hostess and makin people comfortable, I ran around like a maniac prettyin’ things up and fittin chairs all around. I double checked the punch and drinks, made sure there were plenty of napkins and plates and arranged the gift bags ten times.

Well, kitties, people showed up one by one and it was nowhere near the count expected. Where were these no shows? Didn’t they know they were supposed to reply a week ago? Worst yet, my own sister in laws didn’t bother to call me or say they weren’t comin! I simmered on that one a while. Then, to my dismay…I asked my mother in law where they were. Just like that, demanded to know outright. I paused and watched her squirm in her seat, utter some ummms and ahhhhs before she finally croaked out an answer. All I could think was “and how hard was it to rsvp?”  then I got very agitated with them because I go to every single event they have for THEIR children. 

Well kitties, needless to say, I had tons of cake, punch and favors left over. I spent more money than I should have based on proper manners being upheld. That bein’ said, I packed up the cake and favors and went on.

The more I thought about it, reflecting and simmering…I had the notion that maybe it was ME. Maybe I expect more than what society has to offer anymore. Maybe this new millenium has done away with all things proper and we really are goin to hell in a handbasket!  I looked up RSVP to make sure and this is what I found:

“What RSVP Means

The term RSVP comes from the French expression “répondez s’il vous plaît”, meaning “please respond”. If RSVP is written on an invitation it means the invited guest must tell the host whether or not they plan to attend the party. It does not mean to respond only if you’re coming, and it does not mean respond only if you’re not coming (the expression “regrets only” is reserved for that instance). It means the host needs a definite head count for the planned event, and needs it by the date specified on the invitation.

Why It’s Inconsiderate Not to RSVP

An incomplete list of respondents can cause numerous problems for a host including difficulty in planning food quantities, issues relating to minimum guarantees with catering halls, uncertainty over the number of party favors and difficulties in planning appropriate seating, among other things.”

Well kitties, after reading that I was completely reassured that I wasn’t losing my well mannered mind.  I think the world would be a much better place if people would adhere to simple manners. I mean, what is next? No thank you notes for gifts? I shudder to think…..

Civility costs nothin people! Please, thank you, yes m’am, no m’am and not chewin with your mouth open or clankin’ your silverwear on your dishes is expected! Napkins on your laps, elbows off the table, indulge in polite conversation and hold open doors for your ladies!  These are basic things!

quotes by Amy Vanderbilt  Sometimes I cringe to think that there are children out there who have no idea how to act! What are we going to have in 20 years? Right now we are sitting with children who text at the table, talk with full mouths, put their feet on the table, never say please or thank you and who don’t even know what RSVP is let alone what it means! Can you imagine the chaos later on when they get married or need head counts for somethin? I imagine it will be etiquette armageddon.

Which brings me to my new idea: Maybe I should have a Miss Scarlett Charm School for the Etiquettely Challenged…..

My final thought is spoken so nicely by one of my favorite Authors, who people probably don’t associate as having manners…and he was not Southern….enjoy kitties…I must bid you farewell. I’m plotting on my creative RSVP responses to future Sister In Law invitations….

“O, Times! O, Manners! It is my opinion
That you are changing sadly your dominion
I mean the reign of manners hath long ceased,
For men have none at all, or bad at least;
And as for times, altho’ ’tis said by many
The “good old times” were far the worst of any,
Of which sound Doctrine I believe each tittle
Yet still I think these worst a little.

I’ve been a thinking -isn’t that the phrase?-
I like your Yankee words and Yankee ways –
I’ve been a thinking, whether it were best
To Take things seriously, Or all in jest” 
―    Edgar Allan Poe,    Poetry, Tales and Selected Essays

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